The "No TeePee" Scenario Thread
 

Okay, you're in the woods and you just took a real messy dump...

There is no teepee...

What do you do?

:banghead:

Re: The "No TeePee" Scenario Thread
 

I would never defecate in my teepee.

Re: The "No TeePee" Scenario Thread
 

Use the local flora to clean up. As you mentioned woods there should be plenty. A little rough, but it'll do the job. If you're in the desert, that's another matter.

Oh, you mentioned teepee. Heck, if the woods are thick enough nobody will see you.

Re: The "No TeePee" Scenario Thread
 

lol, you could always try the dog trick of rubbing your butt on the ground ;)

Re: The "No TeePee" Scenario Thread
 

My dog is a scoochin' fool

Re: The "No TeePee" Scenario Thread
 

Always keep a couple bucks in your pocket..... :wink:

Re: The "No TeePee" Scenario Thread
 

Yup. Pretty soon fiat will be so worthless it won't be worth wiping your ass with.

Re: The "No TeePee" Scenario Thread
 

As for the teepee question it would depend on the time of year. I have actually used snow before..... can you say pucker power. Also big leaves but they got to be fresh.

Re: The "No TeePee" Scenario Thread
 

Cutting a strip off your boxer shorts works well if you are in a bind.

Re: The "No TeePee" Scenario Thread
 

Indian who drink too much tea before bedtime, wake up in his own teepee :rofl:

Re: The "No TeePee" Scenario Thread
 

Gave that advice to a dummy I was hunting with one day...."Ah, just use a dollar....they ain't worth nothing anyway"......he comes back with poop all over his hands ?

"What happened ?" I asked.

"Humfff.......you ever try to wipe with 3 quarters, 2 dimes and a nickle ?"


:D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D

Re: The "No TeePee" Scenario Thread
 

One word Pepto Bismal ok two words. I drink the stuff like soda and haven't needed toilet paper for weeks.

SHTF somewhere else not aroud here.

Re: The "No TeePee" Scenario Thread
 

Call Ponce, maybe he can borrow you some T.P. :D

Re: The "No TeePee" Scenario Thread
 

Hey-

This is too silly. Even the neandertals had that figured out. Take dump, wipe bum on fur coat-tail, walk on. I just bet they smelled a little funny's all.

Volzka

Re: The "No TeePee" Scenario Thread
 

Let's see...if I remember the old adage...

Leafs of three, use em for TP

Re: The "No TeePee" Scenario Thread
 

Attachment 14914
Might as well use what Bush uses...

Re: The "No TeePee" Scenario Thread
 

Ten people answered this thread an NO ONE got it right.

What was used PRIOR to having indoor plumbing?

The Sears & Roebuck catalog was ALWAYS a favorite. The women got the 'slick' pages and the guys got the 'ruff' stuff.

Or try corn cobs.

If you don't carry AT LEAST one out of date phone book in your bug out vehicle, then too bad. This paper is consistent with the current TP. And you can also use the pages to help start a fire.

Com'n folks, use what you got for more than a hatrack, eh?

Re: The "No TeePee" Scenario Thread
 

Also... Many a young lad was entertained in the outhouse by the ladies' corset and swimsuit illustrations as well.

:smile:

http://www.wrvmuseum.org/journal/images/bikini3.jpg

Re: The "No TeePee" Scenario Thread
 

QWAK,In ancient ROME next to the BATHS were the FIRST comunity toilets and not gender seperated,the constent over flow from the baths flushed the long troughs with BUTT holes! They uses a NATURAL SPONGE on a stick with water,no one knows if they brought there own or used a COMUNAL SPONGE! Thats a FACT JACK!

In the passed, people used a wet RAG and rinced it out,back then they had CLOTH DIPERS so it did not seem so strange and a lot better than CORN COBS or LEAVES! :smile:

Personaly I have stock piled a case or two of TP,I see it as a GOOD investment! LOL

the DUCK

Re: The "No TeePee" Scenario Thread
 

This thread could not have been a better setup for that post.
:thumbs up :thumbs up :thumbs up :congrats: :congrats: :congrats: :haha: :haha: :haha: BRAVO!!!

Re: The "No TeePee" Scenario Thread
 

I don't know about the corn cob thing seems like that might be a little rough. How bout a pine cone?

Re: The "No TeePee" Scenario Thread
 

you could try to solve this one by thinking "outside the box".
You could try to do something to induce diahorrea and then the "dump" becomes a stream - just an air dry could be needed.

Re: The "No TeePee" Scenario Thread
 

My younger brother was into fishing and hunting, most of his t-shirts now have no sleeves. I always had a quarter roll of teepee in the tackle box.:aetsch:

Re: The "No TeePee" Scenario Thread
 

Years agoI worked on a logging crew,one of the men actually used snowballs.
For myself,I alway carry TP in my shirt & jacket pocket.(MRE issue). Before I started carrying I often used leaves.

Re: The "No TeePee" Scenario Thread
 

Never go into the woods without so paper handy. Remember Boy Scouts . Situation solved.

Re: The "No TeePee" Scenario Thread
 

Pine cone!!! Now you're really "roughing it"....Corn cobs are actualy soft if all the kernels are off.

Re: The "No TeePee" Scenario Thread
 

I wouldn't use FRN's. Don't you know about all the germs on those!

Re: The "No TeePee" Scenario Thread
 

So this bear and a rabbit were squatting next to each other taking dumps. The bear asks the rabbit, "Hey, do you have any trouble with shit sticking to your fur?"
"No", says the rabbit, "doesn't stick at all."

"Good," says the bear, as he grabs the rabbit and wipes his ass.
:haha:

Re: The "No TeePee" Scenario Thread
 

I've heard that one before... A true classic!

Re: The "No TeePee" Scenario Thread
 

Re: The "No TeePee" Scenario Thread
 

How to Shit in the Woods: An Environmentally Sound Approach to a Lost Art

http://www.amazon.com/How-Shit-Woods...e=UTF8&s=books

Includes a chapter for women too